In which I talk about an internship at the Savannah River National Laboratory, take many wrong exits, gripe about traffic, and discuss the limits of the human brain. Well... my brain at least.
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Today’s Does of Awesome, AMAZING Dragonborn Comes cover: *******tinyurl****/87qod2w
Today’s Uncyclopedia – Jimmy Wales
His Most Imperial Majestic Leader Jimothy (Jimbo) Wales I, 1st Prince of the United States, Paramount Leader of the Internet is a well-known huckster, Hollywood stunt man, con-man, keeper of the Cheese, pornographer, lemon merchant, pro cunt, dictator of Wikiland, and the co-co-co-co-co-co-co-founder of nothing. He has adopted a lifestyle of libertinage, debauchery, nudism, international travel, kitten huffing, yodeling, masturbation and Ferrari connoisseurship by standing on the shoulders of a million nerds. Jumbo Jimbo Wales simply describes himself as a "rockstar, but without the sex and drugs" . He is well known for his amusing stunts which unfortunately do not succeed in being funny without being stupid. These include editing his own biography to pretend that he actually came up with the whole idea, accusing people of killing JFK, Kevin Costner's career and Gerald Ford.
His account has been locked thricewise and twain for vandalism and replacing entire pages with the phrase TROLLS AER THE 1337 several hundred times. His most memorable vandalism was his repeated claim on the Wikipedia page for Uncyclopedia that Uncyclopedia was, in fact, a parody site of Wikipedia, which was a total load of bullshit. In fact, it is the other way around, Jones imprinted some kind of malicious code on the edit page, locking the statement in place for all to see. For a brief time, he was thought to have been directly involved in the Kennedy assassinations of both John, and his brother, John 2.0. Nothing was ever proven, though the CIA case files remain open.
Oh, he also setup the rules of Wikipedia (a.k.a Beggarpedia) such that you can only create articles about what he decides you can. This forces many people to use his other profit making wiki (Wikia) and everyone who uses it hates him because he forces commercial influences onto them. But that's kinda boring eh? So onto the rest of this crap...
We all know Justin Theroux turned Jennifer Aniston into a bit of a biker chick, but did he turn her into a nudist too? Star Magazine reports Jennifer has started to embrace her curves at home since her longtime nudist fiance Justin persuaded her to join in on the fun! Star goes on to say Jennifer was initially hesistant to try nudism but now finds it extremely liberating. So is this really the naked truth? A source close to the pair tells Gossip Cop the rumor is quote hilarious. Definitely a funny rumor, but is it for real? We'll leave that up to your imagination!