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This is a part 2 of a hilarious sketch parody of David Blaine, the crazy magician who performs street magic. I would be pretty scared now if I ever met David Blaine in real life. For a LOT more funny ass videos, jokes, and stories, go to www.ontigo.com now. Ontigio is updated multiple times a day, so we guarantee you will find something funny. If you like the video, help me out by going to www.ontigio.com and give a digg or stumble on our videos. Or just leave a comment! --Sent via http://heyspread.com
27 Jul 2007
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3:28
The Wild Bunch Sings Death Metal!.........Death Metal Sucks Dick!
23 Feb 2007
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1:01
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12 Mar 2008
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1:00
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31 Dec 2009
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3:07
DSLs and the qualifications
24 May 2009
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0:30
very good bloowjob
6 Sep 2009
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3:56
Directed By: Wolf Haley Edited By: Dave McCary And Wolf Haley From The Album GOBLIN ( yes, its on itunes) Niggas In This Video Include: ANTWAN DIXON NAKEL SMITH MAN CHILD LOUIE LOPEZ JASON DILL THEOTIS BEASLEY TOM RIMALARD GOLDIE LUCAS SAGAN LOCKHART SAGE CASWELL
14 Oct 2011
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0:45
1,500 Americans die every day from cancer. http://lmgtfy.com/?q=THC+cures+cancer "The active ingredient in marijuana cuts tumor growth in common lung cancer in half and significantly reduces the ability of the cancer to spread." - Harvard University "The potential benefits of medicinal Cannabis for people living with cancer include antiemetic effects, appetite stimulation, pain relief, and improved sleep. In the practice of integrative oncology, the health care provider may recommend medicinal Cannabis not only for symptom management but also for its possible direct antitumor effect." - National Cancer Institute Marijuana cures cancer -- US government has known since 1974: The Federal Government of the United States has funded several studies on Cannabis and the active components in Marijuana, which have repeatedly discovered Cannabis' Anti-Tumor properties. A couple of these studies include one conducted in the early 1970's showing a reduction in the spread of various cancers injected into lab rats. In 2006 a study aiming to find the link between Marijuana smoking and cancer concluded that there is no evidence of any kind of causal link between the two, with even some suggestion of preventive qualities. New research shows that marijuana components fight an aggressive form of brain cancer. And the media says -- nothing, again. Combining the two most common cannabinoid compounds in Cannabis may boost the effectiveness of treatments to inhibit the growth of brain cancer cells and increase the number of brain cancer cells that die off. That's the finding of a new study published in the latest issue of the journal Molecular Cancer Therapeutics. Marijuana components have been found to inhibit the growth of the most common, and aggressive form of brain tumor, a glioblastoma, according to a study published in the January 6 issue of Molecular Cancer Therapeutics. The study was done at the California Pacific Medical Center by researchers who combined a non-psychoactive ingredient of marijauna, cannabidiol (CBD), with Δ9-tetrahyrdocannabinol (Δ9-THC), the primary psychoactive ingredient in Cannabis. The findings demonstrated the inhibitory effect of these two ingredients on brain cancer cells when used together. Check out "Run From The Cure The Rick Simpson Story" for further proof... http://youtu.be/0psJhQHk_GI The Cure For Cancer: http://youtu.be/qNRjiPPeRFo What if Cannabis Cured Cancer? (IT DOES!) http://youtu.be/YumClxJV-PU Breaking News: Cannabis Cures Cancer! 3/12/10 http://youtu.be/IAfGVZ1Q7fk Man Cured of Cancer Applying Hemp Oil. http://youtu.be/CiP9LVtE9EY "Chemo has a 27% fatality rate"... The sad fact is that chemo is not only legal, but it is readily accepted by most oncologists as one of the best treatments for cancer. At least that's what the typical oncologist tells the cancer patient.... Marijuana Cuts Lung Cancer Tumor Growth In Half, Study Shows: http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2007/04/070417193338.htm THC Gives Cancer Cells the Munchies Too: http://scienceblogs.com/scientificactivist/2009/04/thc_gives_cancer_cells_the_mun.php Active Component Of Marijuana Has Anti-Cancer Effects, Study Suggests: http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2009/04/090401181217.htm Cannabis Cures Cancer: http://web.me.com/dbhill/cure/Home.html
30 Nov 2011
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2:54
we all suck dick
30 Sep 2008
879
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8:56
Attention please!! (and Im sorry for the missing sound, you know youtube sucks dicks) This is not a list of the Top 15 "Dunker" but a list of the Top 15 "in your face" Dunker! Dont forget that! Its all about players who are not scared at all to serve up a facial on no matter what opponent standing in front of them! Then some general "rules": 1. The dunker can only make the list, when he played at least till 1995. The reason: Untill 1995 the athleticism of NBA players was much more weaker then nowadays. So it was clear that guys like Dr. J or Clyde Drexler jumped over those centers easily. 2. The position: Is he a 7 foot 300 pound center or a little guard? Who does he dunked on and how often? Did he jumped off with full speed? So think first before you post a (negative)comment. Hint: There is a Remix featuring Scottie Pippen. Visit my account and youll find it. The best in your face dunkers ever played on this planet...... 1. Vince Carter Well what can you say about that guy? He has just all what a perfect facial dunker must have: power, hangtime, explosion and style. He is a 6´6 guy who posterizes even much bigger centers at least one time a game. his dunk over Frederic Weiß make him icing on the cake. 2. Shawn Kemp 3. Michael Jordan 4. Amare Stoudemire 5. Shaquille O´Neal 6. Kenyon Martin 7. Kobe Bryant 8. Kevin Garnett 9. Dominique Wilkins 10. Lebron James 11. Tracy McGrady 12. Charles Barkley 13. Chris Webber 14. Jason Richardson 15. Dwyane Wade
1 Feb 2009
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5:23
Comment Rate Subscribe! Lyrics: [Swizz Beats:] Go go 'head go go go 'head go go go go go go 'head go go go go go go 'head oh you fancy huh oh you fancy huh oh you fancy huh oh you fancy huh Nails done, hair done, everything did nails done, hair done, everything did oh you fancy huh oh you fancy huh you you fancy huh oh you fancy huh Nails done, hair done, everything did nails done, hair done, everything did oh you fancy huh [Drake:] You getting ready so I know we gon be here awhile in the bathroom flat irons and nail files spending hours in salons on your hairstyle in the mall steady racking up the air miles hit the gym step on the scales stare at the number you say you dropping 10 pounds preparing for summer and you don't do it for the man, men never notice you just do it for yourself you're the fucking coldest intelligent too ooh you're my sweetheart I've always liked my women book and street smart long as they got a little class like half days and the confidence to overlook my past ways time heals all, and heels hurt to walk in but they go with the clutch that you carry your lip gloss in and look I really think that nobody does it better I love the way you put it together [Chorus:] oh you fancy huh oh you fancy huh oh you fancy huh oh you fancy huh Nails done, hair done, everything did nails done, hair done, everything did oh you fancy huh oh you fancy huh oh you fancy huh oh you fancy huh Nails done, hair done, everything did nails done, hair done, everything did oh you fancy huh [T.I.:] Well aren't you a breath of fresh air from all these superficial gold digging bitches in here they get a baller think that they aint got to pick a career guess they plan on sucking dicks until some millions appear Voila! you do it right he might just buy you a car unless you play these suckers just like B.o.B play the guitar now here you are with your girls having drinks at the bar I say I'm buying you declining I think thats kinda bizarre independant with the demeanor of an RnB singer naked ring finger (check) M3 beamer (check) Champagne range triple white Caddy closet full of brand new clothes and hand bags Alexander McQueen, Prada, Gucci, Chanel D&G, BCBG, Versace, Louie and BeBe Ya don't need it greedy or easy as these other breezy's who fuck for bottles of Riesling or bowls of baked ziti [Chorus] [Drake:] Atlanta girls, let me see your hands wave em at them bitches hating on you with their friends girl you got it let em know that everything big nail done, hair done, everything did And my NY girls let me see your hands wave em at them bitches hating on you with their friends girl you got it let em know that everything big nail done, hair done, everything did And my LA girls, let me see your hands wave em at them bitches hating on you with their friends girl you got it let em know that everything big nails done, hair done, everything did And my TO girls, let me see your hands wave em at them bitches hating on you with their friends girl you got it let em know that everything big nail done, hair done, nail done, hair done [Swizz Beats:] Say go Cinderella go Cinderella orgasm blush lipstick and concealer devil in a tight dress girl you a killer and aint nobody realer and aint nobody realer go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go showtime go, go, go, go as we proceed [Drake:] Uh, 5 and a half em boys ass is off the hook Cinderella bout to lose the glass off her foot and when I find it is when I find you and we can do the things we never got the time to better late than never but never late is better they tell me time is money, well we'll spend it together I'm down for whatever you just lead the way we go to dinner you don't even look at me to pay mature women with more than me were the first to tempt me and Jason had this girl Tammy with a purple Bentley how she got it I aint never get to ask I just knew that she was fine like a ticket on the dash yeah, but shout out to the homeowners the girls that got diplomas and enough money to loan us a little something extra should we ever need it if it sounds like you then let me hear you repeat it [Chorus]
9 Nov 2010
7942
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5:28
I made this video with camtasiastudio 7 and maby the text is a litle bit to slow or fast. but its an awesome song! you can just fallow the text below if you want Cuz some things just, don't change. it's better when they stay the same although the whole world knows your name, some on the biggest days, they came to see you spit your game. Wow oh wow. Shouldn't be difficult to explain just why you came back again? You hate the fame, love the game cold as ice, you remain, fuck em' all, tell em' all eat shit here we go again. You can get the dick just call me the ball sack I'm nuts Michael vick in this bitch. Dog fall back your mutts, fuck your worms. You've never seen such a sick puppy. Fuck it a sick duck I want my duck sick mommy and my nuts licked, gobble them up tric yummy. Bitch you don't fuckin' think I know that you suck dick yummy. You get your butt kicked, fuck all that love shit honey. Yeah I laugh when I call you a slut, it's funny. Shorty dance while I diss you to the beat, Fuck the words you don't listen to em' anyway. Yeah I struck a nerve sucka, Muhfucka might as well let my lips pucker, like Elton John cuz I'm just a mean cock sucka. This shit is on cuz you went and pissed me off now I'm sittin' and pissin on everybody, give a fuck if it's right or wrong. So butt the buddha light a bong but take a look at Mariah next time I inspire you to write a song come on. Oh oh oh oh oh oh, I'm as cold as a cold wind blows when it snows and it's twenty be-low. Ask me why and man I just don't know no no no no no, no. I'm as cold as a cold wind blows blo blo blows blo blo blows. Oh oh oh oh oh FUCK IT I'm a loose cannon Bruce Banners back in the booth y'all are sittin' ducks, I'm the only goose standing. I set the world on fire piss on it put it out stick my dick in a circle, but I'm not fuckin' around. Muhfucka I show your pussy footin, I'll kick a bitch in the cunt till' it makes a queef and sounds like a fuckin whoopee cushion. Who the fuck is it pushin' you must have mistook me for some sissy soft punk lookin' for some nookie or bussum. Go ahead fuckin' hater push me. I told you ain't no fuckin' way to shush me. Call me a faggot cuz I hate a pussy. Man the fuck up sissy g's pull your car and just freeze up, put your hoes down (shady ease up). (Man Chill) Nah I can't god dammit rap is a landfill. Drop that anvil. These are shoes that you can't fill, shit the day that happens the world will stop spinning and Michael J. Fox will come to a stand still. During that earthquake, urine in your face cuz your fake. Ahhh what the fuck that hurt wait ahhh what the fuck I just got struck by lightning. Alright then I quit god I give up. Call it evil that men do now forgive me for what my pen do. (This is for your sins I cleanse you, you can repent but I warn you, if you continue to hell I send you.) and just then the wind blew and I said. Oh, oh oh oh, oh oh, oh, I'm as cold as a cold wind blows when it snows and it's twenty be-low. Ask me why and man I just don't know no no no, no no, no. I'm as cold as a cold wind blows blo blo blows blo blo blows. Oh oh oh oh oh How long will I be this way shady it's in my dying days till I hang up the mic and it's not for me to say so long till then I drop the fuckin bombs like I miss the pass when I went long. If you don't like it you can kiss my ass in a lint thong now sing a long slut, this slut that learn the words to the song. Oh bitches don't like that. Homie I'll be nicer to women when aquaman drowns and the human torch starts swimming. Man I'm a cold soul I roll solo so don't compare me to them other bums over there. It's like apples to oranges, peaches to plums. Yeah I'm bananas pussy cut off the grapes and grow a pear but I swear, you try to diss me I slaughter you. I'll put that on everything, like everyone does with autotune. The last thing you wanna do is have me spit out a rhyme and say I was writing this and I thought of you so Oh oh oh oh oh oh, I'm as cold as a cold wind blows when it snows and it's twenty be-low. Ask me why and man I just don't know no no no no no. I'm as cold as a cold wind blows blo blo blows blo blo blows. Oh oh oh oh oh. I dunno, I dunno what caused, I don't know what caused me to be this way. I dunno, I dunno but I'll probly be this way till my dying day. I dunno whhhhy I'm so, I'm so cold mean things I don't need to say. I guess this is how you ma-ade me.
15 Feb 2011
8014
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7:04
Full Metal Jacket Here's my website: http://militarycompare.com/ JOKER: Is that you, John Wayne? Is this me? HARTMAN: Who said that? Who the fuck said that? Who's the slimy little communist shit twinkle-toed cocksucker down here, who just signed his own death warrant? Nobody, huh?! The fairy fucking godmother said it! Out-fucking-standing! I will P.T. you all until you fucking die! I'll P.T. you until your assholes are sucking buttermilk. Was it you, you scroungy little fuck, huh?! COWBOY: Sir, no, sir! HARTMAN: You little piece of shit! You look like a fucking worm! I'll bet it was you! COWBOY: Sir, no, sir! JOKER: Sir, I said it, sir! HARTMAN: Well ... no shit. What have we got here, a fucking comedian? Private Joker? I admire your honesty. Hell, I like you. You can come over to my house and fuck my sister. You little scumbag! I've got your name! I've got your ass! You will not laugh! You will not cry! You will learn by the numbers. I will teach you. Now get up! Get on your feet! You had best unfuck yourself or I will unscrew your head and shit down your neck! HARTMAN: What's your excuse? COWBOY: Sir, excuse for what, sir? HARTMAN: I'm asking the fucking questions here, Private. Do you understand?! COWBOY: Sir, yes, sir! HARTMAN: Well thank you very much! Can I be in charge for a while? COWBOY: Sir, yes, sir! HARTMAN: Are you shook up? Are you nervous? COWBOY: Sir, I am, sir! HARTMAN: Do I make you nervous? COWBOY: Sir! HARTMAN: Sir, what? Were you about to call me an asshole?! COWBOY: Sir, no, sir! HARTMAN: How tall are you, Private? COWBOY: Sir, five foot nine, sir! HARTMAN: Five foot nine? I didn't know they stacked shit that high! You trying to squeeze an inch in on me somewhere, huh? COWBOY: Sir, no, sir. HARTMAN: Bullshit! It looks to me like the best part of you ran down the crack of your mama's ass and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress! I think you've been cheated! HARTMAN: Where in hell are you from anyway, Private? COWBOY: Sir, Texas, sir! HARTMAN: Holy dogshit! Texas! Only steers and queers come from Texas, Private Cowboy! And you don't look much like a steer to me, so that kinda narrows it down! Do you suck dicks! COWBOY: Sir, no, sir! HARTMAN: Are you a peter-puffer? COWBOY: Sir, no, sir! HARTMAN: I'll bet you're the kind of guy that would fuck a person in the ass and not even have the goddam common courtesy to give him a reach-around! I'll be watching you! HARTMAN: Did your parents have any children that lived? PYLE: Sir, yes, sir! HARTMAN: I'll bet they regret that! You're so ugly you could be a modern art masterpiece! What's your name, fatbody? PYLE: Sir, Leonard Lawrence, sir! HARTMAN: Lawrence? Lawrence, what, of Arabia? PYLE: Sir, no, sir! HARTMAN: That name sounds like royalty! Are you royalty? PYLE: Sir, no, sir! HARTMAN: Do you suck dicks? PYLE: Sir, no, sir! HARTMAN: Bullshit! I'll bet you could suck a golf ball through a garden hose! PYLE: Sir, no, sir! HARTMAN: I don't like the name Lawrence! Only faggots and sailors are called Lawrence! From now on you're Gomer Pyle! PYLE: Sir, yes, sir! HARTMAN: Do you think I'm cute, Private Pyle? Do you think I'm funny? PYLE: Sir, no, sir! HARTMAN: Then wipe that disgusting grin off your face! PYLE: Sir, yes, sir! HARTMAN: Well, any fucking time, sweetheart! PYLE: Sir, I'm trying, sir. HARTMAN: Private Pyle, I'm gonna give you three seconds--excactly three fucking seconds--to wipe that stupid-looking grin off your face, or I will gouge out your eyeballs and skull-fuck you! One! Two! Three! PYLE: Sir, I can't help it, sir! HARTMAN: Bullshit! Get on your knees, scumbag! Now choke yourself! Goddamn it, with my hand, numbnuts!! Don't pull my fucking hand over there! I said choke yourself! Now lean forward and choke yourself!
28 Jun 2011
7776
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4:14
Tyler The Creator - She (Feat. Frank Ocean) (Goblin - 2011) Please Comment, Rate and Subscribe: http://www.youtube.com/user/TheLegendaryRappers IGNORE THESE All rights go to their rightful owners. I'm not the owner of the audio materials that I might used. Copyright Disclaimer Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing. Non-profit, educational or personal use tips the balance in favor of fair use tyler the creator buffalo bill goblin odd future wolf gang kill them all golf wang ofwgkta yonkers sandwitches promo snippet tron cat tyler the creator tron cat goblin odd future wolf gang kill them all golf wang ofwgkta yonkers sandwitches promo snippet hd radicals she transylvania nightmare her fish analog bitch suck dick window au79 golden burger untitled 63 steak sause
28 Sep 2011
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4:00
Who is Amber Cole? A 14 year old girl slobbin the knob like corn on the cob In a public school Share on twitter click here http://clicktotweet.com/d6i0h Cyber bullying and child pornography is terrible. I don't condone it. But still You don't go around in Public sucking dick letting people record you and expect it not to hit the web. Technically she did do a crime, because she is under age and the video is considered child pornography. Also, she is not even at the age of consent for sex. So yeah, crime committed. Just Saying. Enough about Amber Cole though, she's OLD NEWS! A 10 year old girl just lost her virginity in China... her name was Sum Yung Ho Links Facebook http://www.facebook.com/JayFluent Twitter http://twitter.com/jayfluent Tumblr http://jayfluent.tumblr.com/ Music Youtube http://www.youtube.com/youngflipmusic
20 Oct 2011
23491
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1:39
The clip calling hotel staff chained to Lutz from Bruno (2009) Good morning, cowboy. What's your name? Lutz. Get that out of my face. Move that out of my... No, Lutz. Hello? Engineering. Hello, I apologise for the state of the room. But can I assure you, the toilet is absolutely spotless. Can you look? The key, I think, is over there, just... No, I can't do this. Yeah, Brian, I need you up here on 20 immediately. Well, no, it's 2 guys handcuffed together on a bed. And there's some contraption with a dildo on the end of it. And they're asking... They've been staying at the hotel for a while and wanted to know if I can get the key for them because they can't get out of bed. I'm pretty freaking flipping right now. Come in. Can you tell me what's going on? You were not meant to see this. You find the key, I can get out of this. Now, can you just look under that shelf... No. This is not what was supposed to be going on in here. You're telling me, honey. I should be chained to a 6'4" Norwegian with a PhD in sucking dick. That's not my concern. Okay, well, listen, one other thing. Can you switch off the television? Because I made a fart, and I am on the verge of buying Mr. Magorium's Wunderbar Emporium. That's unfortunate. No, but I refuse to pay for Mr. Magorium's Wunderbar Emporium. I did not press it. No, I'm afraid we are not gonna be doing that. Hey, listen, you. What's your name? Hi. What's your name? No, don't even talk to me. You're cute. You're like a Latino Paul Giamatti. Hey, don't talk to me. I'm not talking to you. Hey, girlfriend.
26 Oct 2011
10259
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