The clip credits-closing-part-4 from The Five-Year Engagement (2012) . Powered by: Anyclip. any moment from any film.
- Oh, yay!
I'm proud of you!
You finally did it, you fucking assholes!
I love you.
We love you guys, too.
In fact, it makes us feel like singing!
The clip two-weeks-notice from The Five-Year Engagement (2012) with Lauren Weedman. Powered by: Anyclip. any moment from any film.
- Two years. - Two years?
Yeah. It's long.
It's not? No, it's not.
In the scheme of us spending our whole lives together.
Two years? That's...
And then we can come back here, right?
- Yeah, of course. It's just two years. - Yeah, that's...
- And, look, I can cook anywhere. - Right.
I've cooked in New York. I've cooked in L.A.
I'm pretty sure I can handle Michigan.
All right. Listen. Here's what I propose.
Let's just put off the wedding. We're not in any rush.
- Really? - Yeah.
We'll get to Michigan, we'll get settled in.
And then we'll start planning the wedding again from there
once we have our bearings.
- Can I just say something? - Yeah.
I think we both know that I deserve to get super laid for this.
Do you want me to wear a cape or something?
I mean. Theoretically, whatever you want.
I'm just saying I don't want weekday sex.
- You're guilt-sexing me! - I want the show. I want the show.
- You're gonna get the show. - Good, I better.
You're gonna get the Cirque du Soleil of shows.
The clip a-birthday-game from The Five-Year Engagement (2012) with Emily Blunt, Jason Segel. Powered by: Anyclip. any moment from any film.
Tom, be more Indian than that.
Let's paint. Let's paint.
Let's paint. Let's paint. Let's paint.
- I don't understand... - We're making art together.
But why do we need goggles?
This is a new level of our relationship.
This feels dumb.
We've reached a plateau.
This feels dumb.
We have unfinished business. Is this about revenge?
I'm so bored.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you too, Audrey.
I love you.
Please stop doing that to my face.
Why? I just want to see your eyes, they're so pretty.
Tom, that was really aggressive.
Apology accepted. I forgive you.
Babe. Really, honestly...
It's, like-- raw down there at this point. I gotta sleep.
- Tommy, go faster! - Fuck.
The clip a-birthday-game-part-2 from The Five-Year Engagement (2012) with Emily Blunt, Jason Segel. Powered by: Anyclip. any moment from any film.
Oh, my God! Tom!
Hey, Violet, happy birthday. Just thinking of you.
Looks like the Michigan Psych Department has been busy,
I found this on the Internet.
Not sure if you're aware of it.
Anyways, hope all is well. Love, Tom
You just go to sleep,
and then upon completion of the experiment, you will receive $35 check.
The clip pick-a-date from The Five-Year Engagement (2012) with Jacki Weaver, Emily Blunt. Powered by: Anyclip. any moment from any film.
See, he calls it an "it."
Dude, Clam Bar. Booked for an entire month.
You cannot get a table for 30 days,
Thank you so much for quitting, bro. You made my career.
Oh. Yeah. I did it all for you, buddy.
Anyways... So how's Michigan?
You know, it's a bit of an adjustment. But, all in all-- it's fine.
- Wow. - Sorry.
Have you told her how much you hate it?
I don't hate it.
A bit of Irish stoicism never hurt anyone.
Well, I think it hurt-- a shitload of Irish people.
Bro, you gotta be honest with her, man.
I am honest.
No, you're not.
You're not being honest with me.
You're not being honest with her.
Don't be a martyr.
Trust me, dude.
You need to be honest with this woman.
She's going to be your wife.
Like me, for example. When Suzie told me that she was pregnant?
I was like--
"There's no fucking way you're keeping this baby."
Because that's what I felt.
I was like--
"No. It's not mine. I know it!"
Because I was being honest.
I didn't get caught up on how that would make her feel.
You know, I was just being myself.
She of course, figured out later
that that was just panic and anger setting in.
And now she knows that about me.
So, two weeks ago, when I was trying to talk her
into giving up the baby for adoption, she's like--
The clip the-donut-experiment from The Five-Year Engagement (2012) with Emily Blunt, Rhys Ifans. Powered by: Anyclip. any moment from any film.
Oh, sorry, look, it's none of my business. I shouldn't intrude.
You know, it's your and Tom's thing. I understand.
I mean, it's not a secret.
It's just that-- I think I just wish Tom were happier here.
Has he told you he's unhappy?
No, but I can tell.
Listen, I-- I think Tom is fantastic.
But you mustn't let his situation make you feel guilty.
You've worked hard to get here. Okay?
You're on the verge, you know?
It's okay to be selfish.
You're a good person, a very good person.
And Tom will be fine.
Tom is all right. Tom will understand.
- Hey, Professor. - Hey, Ashley.
God! You know everyone here.
Well, most of the girls are called Ashley. And most of the guys are called Zack.
So I play the odds.
Hey... Zack! How's Ashley?
And now if you'll excuse me, I'm late for tae kwon do.
French vanilla with coconut custard?
I mean, who thinks of that? Some sort of genius.
With or without the fruit compote?
You're going to want the fruit compote.
So. You guys have, kind of, had a lot.
This cake is so good.
Cake testing is the best.
I know, I don't know why girls get so tense about all this planning.
The clip elmo-vs-cookie-monster from The Five-Year Engagement (2012) with Emily Blunt, Alison Brie. Powered by: Anyclip. any moment from any film.
My ex-fiancée has been on my mind a lot
and I feel like that's something I need to explore.
Well, she's an old bitch! There.
I just explored it for you. Done?
It's hard to have this conversation with you.
You need to explore it, Tom?
You were with her for 5 fucking years. That's a really long time.
What else is there to learn about her?
I don't really know the answer to that,
but I just think I need to find out.
What are you thinking? You're so stupid.
You're so stupid. You're going to leave me?
You're going to leave this?
For saggy tits and a loose vagina? Really?
I'm sorry to do this to you.
Shut the fuck up.
You know what? You should just go, Tom.
Just go. Go! Go have fun. Have fun with your old woman.
Go fucking read at night together.
You can go through menopause together.
And you can go your little prostates checked.
Check each other for lumps all the time
and do those kinds of things together.
And then go get some Crocs, so your back doesn't hurt.
And then you can go walk on the beach
and fuck each other with your gross, wrinkly balls.
That's another thing. You're getting fucking fat.
It's really hard to have sex with someone
when you can't breathe underneath them.
Can't breathe, like, I feel like I'm going to die every time.
You should leave. I'm going to say mean things.
The clip elmo-vs-cookie-monster-part-2 from The Five-Year Engagement (2012) with Emily Blunt, Alison Brie. Powered by: Anyclip. any moment from any film.
He makes me lie down in green pastures
and leads me beside still waters.
He shall refresh my soul and guide me in the path of righteousness...
You're my good one.
I am so mad Alex, when you say that.
At least I'm not the one failing as a parent.
It's all right, It's all right.
Give him a couple Vicodin.
- Wow. Hi, - Hi.
- Hello. - Hello, Gideon.
Didn't expect to see you.
The clip the-university-of-michigan from The Five-Year Engagement (2012) with Jason Segel, Jason Segel. Powered by: Anyclip. any moment from any film.
Lots of this. And this stuff.
- Not a mime. - Yeah.
You really don't think our family
is going to be disappointed that we're delaying?
You know what? They'll live.
And now, a moment of silence for Leonora.
Boy, we were packed last night.
I got reservations coming in like crazy.
What's going on?
I'm actually here to give you my two weeks' notice.
I can't thank you enough for all I've learned
from you for the past couple of years.
It's been amazing, and so...
I was gonna name you head chef at my new restaurant.
What's going on?
Wow! Uh, okay.
I really wish that you would have told me that earlier.
My- okay. So my fiancée. Violet, who you've met--
got a job in Michigan.
This is why marriage is dumb! Okay? It's dumb!
You have a job here, and she's got a job there.
You guys can't do anything because you're so connected.
So then one of you has to get the shaft.
This is why I voted against gay marriage.
Please don't tell people.
Well- you know, just saying. What are you supposed to do?
It's like your fiancée gets offered her dream job.
What are you going to do, say no?
I have to go.
The clip toms-past from The Five-Year Engagement (2012) with Emily Blunt, Chris Pratt. Powered by: Anyclip. any moment from any film.
Doing a bit of a multi-media presentation here, so just one second.
Here we go.
Oh, Tommy boy, I've known you for a long time.
Violet, you are certainly the love of his life.
And we use this moment to celebrate
a new future of commitment and love.
But not without first exploring a past.
Here we go.
Jenni Newman, Greta Kay, Anne Peña, Lizzie Gray
Kelly Wozack, Dana Gilpin and Lizzie Gray again
Jill McCarthy, Teresa Nassbaum, Sally Baker, Big Alice
This Korean, that Korean. and Lizzie Gray again
Ingrid Pell and my ex. Even though they claimed no sex
Rock and roll and cola wars I can't take it anymore
Violet didn't start Tom's fire
It was always burning and she got the ring on
She wasn't his first lover
As it turns out He fucked some others
Okay, that's enough. I think that's enough, right?
The clip lunch-with-suzie-and-alex from The Five-Year Engagement (2012) with Emily Blunt, Chris Pratt. Powered by: Anyclip. any moment from any film.
You never talk about it.
Because I'm a man, and men and women are different.
We don't have to sit around and talk about our feelings.
What? There's nothing to say!
You say, "I'm upset," Tom! You say it!
Fine! You want to talk about it?
- Yes! - I hate it here!
- Thank you! - I hate it here!
- Thank you for... - I think it sucks here!
- I think it sucks my fucking dick! - Great!
Good for you.
I hate it! I hate it here!
Okay, okay, okay. But now we move forward.
Now what should we do?
Would you like to open up a Clam Bar here?
You can't get fresh clams here.
I meant it as a metaphor.
You know what? This is all very confusing.
And I'm clearly overwhelmed. And I've gotta be honest?
I think the best thing would be for me to just be alone right now
so that I can think.
I'll just give you some time then, shall I?
Well, don't go, I mean...
I need-- I need you here.
What do you mean? You just told me you needed time alone.
What do you want? I don't know what you want.
- I don't want you to go. - Okay.
I just want to be alone with you here.
- Can you at least lay down? - Okay.
Like a normal human being?
- Do you want me just to be. - I want...
- Okay. - I'm trying to be alone.
The clip lunch-with-suzie-and-alex-part-2 from The Five-Year Engagement (2012) with Emily Blunt, Chris Pratt. Powered by: Anyclip. any moment from any film.
I'm sorry, too.
I know that things are really complicated right now, babe.
I just want us both to be happy.
Do you think we could do that here?
One, two, dinner.
The clip breaking-up-with-audrey from The Five-Year Engagement (2012) with Dakota Johnson, Dakota Johnson. Powered by: Anyclip. any moment from any film.
Yes! I knew it.
I'm the best, I'm the best.
What the fuck?
Ming is the best.
So, you cheated to get me the job.
So what if I cheated to get the woman I love to stick around?
I have a question...
Would you have even considered my donut experiment
if Doug had suggested it?
Of course not.
- Wow. - Okay.
In a way, Ming. It's like-- their whole relationship
was the donut experiment.
- Nice. - Thank you.
Fine, fine, fine.
There will be new students next year.
There's always a new Violet.
- Oh, no! - Oh!
He did not.
- Um. - Oh.
- This was-- - Yeah.
Oh, my God!
Turn off the light. Turn off the light, turn off the light.
These pancakes are delicious.
They put a cinnamon glaze. They're dreamy.
You shouldn't be eating them.
It's why we're here. We're here to eat, right?
The clip rehearsal-dinner from The Five-Year Engagement (2012) with Emily Blunt, Chris Pratt. Powered by: Anyclip. any moment from any film.
What do you think?
I think I love it.
Should we just book this place for the rehearsal dinner as well?
- Done. - Done.
Sounds great to me.
- Hi. - Hello.
We were wondering, do you do weddings?
You both Jewish?
I'm so excited for tomorrow night.
- Yeah. - Our rehearsal dinner.
I can't believe it. It's finally here.
What's going on?
Something. What's up?
Winton kissed me.
- What? - It meant nothing.
It was a few weeks ago.
He was drunk and he didn't mean what he was doing, Tom.
It was a stupid mistake.
He was drunk.
He's not coming tomorrow night.
No, he's not. I will tell him that.
This will never, ever happen again.
I really wish you hadn't told me that.
The clip rehearsal-dinner-part-2 from The Five-Year Engagement (2012) with Emily Blunt, Chris Pratt. Powered by: Anyclip. any moment from any film.
Is this going to happen?
It's going to happen.
Because it's fine if it's not.
Yeah, it's going to happen.
It's about to happen.
The clip zingermans-delicatessen from The Five-Year Engagement (2012) with Jason Segel, Jason Segel. Powered by: Anyclip. any moment from any film.
So, you quit your chef job in San Francisco to move to Michigan?
Believe it or not? I did, yeah.
Who does that?
So, what were they paying you in San Francisco?
$18.50 an hour.
- Oh, shit! - Yeah.
That's pretty good.
I was lucky.
I probably couldn't do that. I could do 11.
You know what, it's a different market. I totally understand.
You got to start somewhere.
Well, I thought you just said 11.
I got it. You're fucking with me.
We don't really have any openings. Sorry.
Ooh! Impressive knife skills.
Thank you. I've heard that before.
So, yeah. Do I have the job?
No, I'm sorry. I just needed those onions chopped.
You're joking, right?
No. Good luck, though.
You left San Francisco to come to Michigan?