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Do you want to discover your true life's purpose?
More ease? Maybe even more money? I have one simple
answer, so simple you'll push it away thinking that
it could never work. Here it is:
Stop judging yourself. That's it. End of story.
Oh, you have questions? Of course, just like me.
When you stop judging yourself, you can listen to
inspiration. You can hear the voice of love, choice,
wisdom and true direction. Or you can listen to
self-judgment, a voice of attack, limits, smallness,
and a voice that always threatens some misfortune,
or just can't help but point to cobwebs in your
past. In the wisdom tradition of A Course in
Miracles, it says "Your divided devotion has given
you the two voices, and you must choose at which
altar you want to serve."
What does serving the voice of judgment get you? It'
s like inviting a bad houseguest into your living
space, one that is noisy, rude, throwing things
around and then complaining about the mess. I used
to think that self-judgment was somehow a tool for
staying sharp, getting ahead, not falling asleep at
the wheel. I can't tell you how much time I've
spent, deciding, that while I've never been this
age, or in this career, or on this exact leg of my
journey, I knew how it should go, what should not be
happening. I spent so much time lamenting my
circumstances, that I had no real time or energy to
actually investigate them. Self -judgment doesn't
keep you savvy. It keeps you ignorant and uninvolved
with reality.
Self-judgment blocks your sense of true direction.
You can't hear the bird song when the tuba takes
over. "Oh, you'll never get anywhere, this isn't
good. You'll never amount to anything. I can't
believe you're this age and you still haven't gotten
it together." But what if you were listening to a
voice of trust and love instead? One that said, "I
know you can do this. Take all the time you need. I
believe in you. I know you have more strength than
you can imagine. "
This is the best piece of advice I can ever give
you: Cultivate the voice of self- love inside you.
Listen to the angels of acceptance. Listen to your
Buddha Nature. Listen to the smallest golden leaf on
the aspen tree, your Aunt Sadie who bakes oatmeal
cookies, Jesus, that rascal of forgiveness, your
golden retriever. Listen to the exuberant river.
Listen to Allah or Moses come down from the mountain
with awe on his face. Listen to the poets Rumi or
Kabir, Blake or Whitman. They are all saying one
thing and one thing only: You are loved. You are
loved. You have everything inside you. This moment
will absolutely free you, if you free it from
judgment.
Everyone struggles with self-judgment. Even one of
the most famous peace leaders of our time, Gandhi,
once said, "My most formidable opponent is a man
named Mohandas K. Gandhi. With him I seem to have
very little influence." But where does self-judgment
come from? Self judgment is often somebody's
inappropriate expectations or distorted opinion
pressed down upon your innocence. It's somebody's
lack of love for themselves, their own soul's
jaundice, poison, or ache that got foisted onto you.
You didn't know it was a misunderstanding. You
believed the lie. You believed you were broken or
doing it wrong. You believed what your soul could
never believe. So you stopped listening to your own
soul and allowed the lie to move in and buy
furniture, home décor, an education and a
lifestyle. Now it's time to listen to your soul. Now
it's time to let go of the cracked and blackened
mirror.
But maybe, you think that if you stopped judging
yourself, you'd really slide down that hill. That's
also a lie. You will never grow into your greatest
capacity under the manacles of judgment. Carl
Rogers, the renowned Humanist psychologist, said