Sixteen Candles (1984): Girl Advice from the Geek

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Published 6 Dec 2011
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The clip Girl advice from the Geek from Sixteen Candles (1984) with Michael Schoeffling, Anthony Michael Ha...
The clip Girl advice from the Geek from Sixteen Candles (1984) with Michael Schoeffling, Anthony Michael Hall

These are really hers? Yeah.
How did you get 'em?
She gave 'em to me.
Did you... No! No, Jake.
She's crying for you.
I told her you asked about her. Right? The girl freaked.
She had a hissy. She thinks you're the cat's meow. Really?
Yeah. She came up to me in the gym tonight.
She looked at me like I was a leper.
Girls'll do that, Jake.
You see, they know guys are, like, in perpetual heat, right?
They know this shit. And they enjoy pumping us up.
It's pure power politics, I'm tellin' you.
I thought she hated my guts.
Games, Jake. Silly, torturous games.
You know how many times a week I go without lunch because some bitch borrows my lunch money?
Any halfway decent girl can rob me blind!
Because I'm too torqued up to say no.
It's heinous, I'm telling you.
You better not be dickin' me around.
It'd be a major downer to try and get together and find out she really does think I'm a slime.
Jake, would I dick you?
Let me put it to you this way.
What happens to me if I dick you?
[Chuckles] I'd kick your ass.
Right. So why would I lie?
But I feel compelled to mention, Jake, if all you want is a piece of ass, I mean,
I'll either do it myself, or get someone bigger than me, to kick your ass.
I mean, not many girls in contemporary American society today would give their underwear to help a geek like me.
I can get a piece of ass anytime I want.
Shit, I got Caroline in my bedroom right now, passed out cold.
I could violate her ten different ways if I wanted to.
What are you waiting for? I don't know.
She's beautiful, and she's built and all that.
[Sighs] I'm just not interested anymore.
Does that really matter, guy? Yeah, it matters.
She's totally insensitive. Look what she did to my house.
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