The clip divorce agreement from Wedding Crashers (2005) with Dwight Yoakam, Rebecca De Mornay
I don't have custody of the kids.
You know what?
I don't get custody.
It is an insane pathetic joke, what I've had to go through.
Right now, right now she doesn't know where the kids are, do you?
Do not talk about me as a mother.
Are they at home?
I'm so sick to death of you talking about me as a mother and what I've done wrong!
They at your sister's? Where they're probably at a firehouse somewhere. She'd just drop 'em off with a fireman, you know?
Do not talk about that!
I am sick of you accusing me of not being a good mother!
Are they at home? Are they at home?
Seven years I've been a good mother!
A perfect mother? I can't have custody.
Just remember when we went out. Just remember how you...
Right now. Where is Tim right fucking now?
Don't you talk about me being a mother. I hate you!
Hey, I got an idea. Why don't you just kiss my left nut?
I told you this was a bad idea.
You know what, Ken?
A bad idea would be to let your client walk outta here today and drag this thing out for another year, wasting more time and wasting more money.
The only good idea is to let me and John do our job and mediate this thing right here.
You wanna hear the crazy thing?
I know it doesn't feel like it, but we're making progress.
We settled the deal with the cars.
Let's see, that takes us to frequent flyer miles. We're flying!
Those are mine.
I want them.
You know what we're gonna do? We're gonna split 'em right down the middle.
How'd that be, Mr. Kroeger?
It would be no-not good at all!
Yeah, you earned them flying to Denver to meet your whore.
Well, she's not afraid to express herself sexually if that's what you mean.
She's a stripper, for God's sake!
She is not!
Her name is Chastity!
She is white trash! Same as you.
That's it, go comatose for me, baby.
You shut your mouth when you're talkin' to me!
Hold it. This is getting confusing.
You didn't always hate each other.
There had to be some nice moments, during the courtship, maybe?