The clip Smooth Guide-ess from Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason (2004) with Renée Zellweger, Hugh Grant
and my sodding mum and dad are doing it twice.
# No more candlelight No more romance
# No more small talk...
New York: The Big, Juicy Apple.
The city that never sleeps with the same person two nights running.
My favorite place in America, where Sex And The City isn't just a program,
it's a promise.
Oh, cheer up, misery guts. I have good news for you.
What's the angle? I interview some rocket scientist
while he looks through my skirt with X-ray glasses?
Although that is a bloody good idea.
No. The fact is The Smooth Guide is doing very well with women,
but the network want us to cast a wider net and use a Smooth Guide-ess.
Me? With Daniel Cleaver?
It's the next logical step. I think Thailand is first on the list.
No. I won't do it.
Not now. Not in a million years from now.
I am a top television journalist,
not some boorish bint in a bikini.
Really? Strong words from somebody who doesn't know where Germany is.
Who told you that?
Cleaver. He said he couldn't be expected to go out with someone
who thought Iran was David Bowie's wife, and who didn't know where Germany was.
Daniel Cleaver is a deceitful, sexist, disgusting specimen of humanity,
that I wouldn't share a lift with, let alone a job.
Come on, Jones, there must have been something you liked about me.
Well... you have a nice car.
And quite nice manners. Outside the bedroom.
But that's about it.
And by the way, I know exactly where Germany is.
The question is do you know the location of your arsehole?