Big Fan (2009): Paul Bizzare Conversation with His Mother

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Published 25 Nov 2011
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The clip Paul bizzare conversation with his mother from Big Fan (2009)

What do you have against Price Club...
The clip Paul bizzare conversation with his mother from Big Fan (2009)

What do you have against Price Club?
I'd rather not discuss my career.
You have a career?
That's news to me.
You could actually go somewhere at Price Club.
Yeah, like Dennis? Please.
He's doing extremely well for himself.
Okay.
Who knows? You could probably meet somebody.
Well, what does that mean?
Your brother and sister both found people at work.
Yeah, Gina was Jeff's secretary.
He cheated on his wife with her.
She's a lot better for him than that louse Roberta.
He's a cheat. He fucked her while he was still married.
Don't say that word in my car.
Which one? "Fucked" or "cheat"? You know.
It's what he did. He fucked her.
For years while he was married. Stop it.
I don't want that language in my car.
Oh, so it's worse for me to say it than for him to do it?
Cut it out, Paul.
No, I wanna know. Is it worse for me
to say the sentence, "Jeff fucked his secretary,"
than it is for Jeff to fuck his secretary?
You should only meet somebody as good as Gina.
Oh, boy, that'd be tough to top.
Yeah, for you.
Yeah, give me about an hour.
You have to actually date someone to top it.
I date.
Oh, sure. You're dating lots of girls.
You don't think I date?
I know exactly who you're dating. Your hand.
What did you just say?
You think I don't see those tissue balls in your garbage pail?
What the hell! Either that,
or you're just sneezing a lot. Maybe you just had a very bad cold
for the last 15 years. I'm not hearing this.
The kind of cold where you sneeze
out of your you-know-where! Oh, Jesus!
I'm not hearing this! You probably don't think I don't see
those doo-doo stains in your underpants, neither. Oh, God.
Leave it alone. You don't like it?
Do your own laundry. And keep your hands off your privates!
La la la la la la la!
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