Zack and Miri Make a Porno (2008): Talking About Masterbating with Sex Toys

The clip talking about masterbating with sex toys from Zack and Miri Make a Porno (2008) with Seth Rogen, Elizabeth Banks

"for discretionary jacking off."
That way if you get caught, no one thinks it's weird.
You're just a guy who likes to fuck his flashlight.
I am totally buying this shit.
Whoa, if you've got money to burn, how about paying the electric bill?
That's due already?
November's is probably due now,
but I was talking about September's. Tell me this doesn't rock.
You kind of look like Ronald McDonald.
That makes me want some McNuggets.
Why would you wanna buy a pocket pussy anyway? That is so sad.
What? Excuse me, I forgot about the nobility
that accompanies coming with a fucking vibrator.
Think a kid in Darfur gets saved every time a vibrator makes you come? No.
"Real feel action"? Oh, my God.
Yeah.
If you start fucking machines, I'm moving out.
What do you think a vibrator is? It's a machine.
How come you get to fuck something with a motor in it?
I've never met a man who can make me come like a vibrator does.
That's bullshit. You get to be Buck Rogers having sex in the 25th century
with fucking Twiki and Dr. Theopolis.
I'm stuck to a bottle of Jergens in the bathroom.
Holy bejesus. You do not use my Jergens to jack it in our bathroom.
No, you know what I do actually, is I light a bunch of candles
and I sprawl out on my sheets and I listen to Sting.
No, I'm a guy. Give me two Popsicle sticks and a rubber band,
I'll find a way to fuck it, like a filthy MacGyver.
Oh, my God, I'm so glad I'm not a guy. How about this?
I don't get why you're putting so much effort into this thing.
I thought we were just gonna go to sit around and make fun of everybody.
I can't wear anything that I already own and expect to bring home Bobby Long.
Bobby fucking Long? No way. Didn't that guy call you "Stinky Linky"?
Yeah, that was then, okay?
Maybe now he can save me a fortune in Amazon bills.

1. By: AnyClip
2. Categories Entertainment
3. Views 3,260
4. Added :26-Nov-11
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