Stay awhile and Listen
Greeting, it is I Deckard Cain During the progression of Diablo lll, I was tortured and slain by Maghda, one of Diablo’s minion’s wielding dark and foul magics. My body was burned and tears were shed, I was surely deceased or so it would seem. As I drifted into the great abyss, my thoughts never wavered from Leah. I believe that those thoughts were the only things that kept me from losing myself and from becoming one with the universal energies forever…
I found myself spinning forward in time like some reckless lightning bolt. The madness of one left all alone in isolation for an eternity threatened to consume me. It was then that a voice came to me, calling me, “Deckard Cain, your life is not finished, there is much to do, many lives to save and knowledge of the ancients to archive. This voice seemed to guide me, it gave me a purpose. It was then that a blinding flash of white light surrounded me, I was pulled out of this river of time. I felt a warm embrace and I drifted into unconsciousness, only to awake in my old body yet in a new and wondrous time.
The year was 2017 and Diablo’s wicked plans and prophecy were at work, even here, even now.
If there was a place to obtain information, I knew it would be a tavern. Surely I will find one if I followed these lights on the sides of the path where these metal carriages travel.
On my journey I slowly made my way through this new and strange world to what appeared to be an advanced city of sorts. My old eyes have never seen the likes of it before. As I approached I thought it best to stay in the shadows and observe.
Since my old journal was lost to the ages I needed another form to document my findings. I had rely on my resources. I found these curious cubes made of brown, pressed and firm paper in an alley. I tore away some slivers of this pape
Stay awhile and listen
Well hello, it is I Deckard Cain. Upon leaving the tavern, the sky opened up with a heavy rain. Even though the temperature outside wasn’t cold I needed to seek shelter or else ruin my fecal tomes. Though the stars in the sky were hidden by the storm clouds, the lights of the city made it tolerable enough to navigate. I headed in the direction of a bridge. I only hope I don’t run into an evil troll and or goblin tribe. They are nasty and foul tempered when disturbed. The only thing worse than running into a troll and or goblin tribe is running into a hungry troll and or goblin tribe. No wait I just thought of something even worse. Running into a horny troll and or goblin tribe.
As I drew closer to the bridge, my nose told me that my fears may come true, for the scent coming from that area could easily be a horny and hungry troll and or goblin tribe. That’s even worse!
I drew even closer to the bridge. My eyes could make out a fire burning in a metal barrel and cloaked humanoids wandering around aimlessly. I had to get closer and listen to the language they were using. Fortunately for me these cloaked individuals were human but what I needed to know is; were they friendly? I must tell you that after the horny troll and goblin thoughts I was having, my butt hole was quite a bit relieved, but I couldn’t afford to relax completely until I was safe and dry under that bridge.
There was only one way to know for sure. I walked right into the lions den. The hairs on my entire body stood on end as every step led me into the arms of fate. Now I will bet that when I said “all the hairs on my body stood on end”. You pictured me naked. I will also bet that if you didn’t picture me naked then, you are now. How embarrassing for you:)
I walked right passed one of these people, then another, then a group,
Stay awhile and Listen
Well met traveler, I am Deckard Cain. Skeeter rounded up all of her people and they formed a long line. One at a time I healed each and every one of them until skeeter brought a young boy to me. His name was Wink, he seemed a happy little fellow of about the age of 9. Wink was a curious boy, more interested in running around and playing hide and seek than being investigated and prodded by the likes of myself.
I tried to heal little Wink only to find that he was in perfect health. Why would skeeter bring me a healthy boy. She said that I must have lost my powers because that boy has never spoken a single word, not in the 7 years that he was under skeeters care. I tried a more focused approach. Something was there in his throat, something odd. Like something in prisoned or at least in a shell that my powers couldn't open. I was exhausted, my powers needed to rest. As I sat next to skeeter I found something to be perplexing. I know I healed everyone's afflictions, so why is everyone still scratching at their pubic realms? Even skeeter was digging at her no no go go.
I convinced skeeter, though she didn't need much convincing, to take her pants off and lie down. I needed to examine her further. That's when I saw them. I call them tiny demons but these people called them crabs. My healing powers have no effect on these tiny demons. I needed to think back to a lesson my dead mother had taught me and then, I remembered.
I shaved one half of Skeeters pubic mound, applied a flammable oil to the other half, then set it ablaze. When these tiny demon ran out of the inferno, I stabbed them with a sewing needle. Thus sending them back to the foul place from which they came.
We taught these people how to perform this procedure and eradicate these tiny demons thus ending the epidemic. Their pain and suffering would become just a memory over time but I will never forget the smell of burning pubic hair that lingered for days in my nostrils. I belie